RHOA RECAP: JUST PUT ON A HAPPY FACE!

RHOA RECAP: JUST PUT ON A HAPPY FACE!

 
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By Joanne Rosa

As the Maui trip continues, the group tries to keep it cool.

As the group begins to wake up, faux friends Phaedra and Kenya play nice in a friendly game of tennis. Kenya believes that she and Phaedra are good, because of their truce a while back. Kenya brought up meeting a new single guy, but Phaedra wasn’t having it. She wants to save those talks for Porsha.

Meanwhile, Cynthia decided to celebrate Peter’s birthday. This will be the last birthday they celebrate together as husband and wife! Cynthia gives Peter a pure departing gift: a blinged out bible. Kind of a strange gift to give your soon-to-be ex-hubby… Anyway, Peter and Cynthia discussed their marriage, and Cynthia said she believed she wasn’t always a good wife.

At least Cynthia never entertained other people while they were married!

When the sun set, Kandy and Todd had the idea to have a Peter roast, instead of a pig roast. Everyone arrived on time, for once, except for Sheree. After her blow up with Bob, things are very awkward between them and everyone around them. Eventually, she showed up to dinner.

Everyone moved to the couch and went on stage one by one, except Sheree. She wasn’t really in the joking mood. There were some funny jokes and some not so funny jokes. However, the biggest joke of all was Cynthia’s attempt to roast soon-to-be ex-hubby. She ended the roast with how good he brushes his teeth…

Cynthia, you’re gorgeous.

On the last day of the trip, the group goes on a catamaran to enjoy the sunset and each other’s company. Everyone, that is, except Sheree and Bob. They still have a lot to work out. Bob goes to cheers Sheree, but Sheree wants to know what the occasion is. Bob wants to apologize, but then admits that he has no idea why Sheree left the jewelry shop.

Bob, if you’re gonna apologize, know what the apology is for.

Sheree said that she and Bob never talk about anything serious that happened in their relationship. She brought up when Bob left for six months in the middle of their marriage, and didn’t call once. Sheree’s kids were two and five at the time. Bob went to school in California, and Sheree was left to care for the kids, the house, and all of the bills. Later on in their marriage, Bob also spitefully cut all of the credit cards they shared, and didn’t pay the mortgage.

Sheree doesn’t buy Bob’s apology, and neither do we. He obviously loves Sheree, but she is too good for him, and has been through too much.

Bob asks Sheree what he is supposed to do in this situation, and Sheree replied that if he doesn’t know as a grown man what to do, then she couldn’t teach him. Well, Bob didn’t exactly like that answer. He starts freaking out, and asks if Sheree wants him to cut his wrists and bleed out so she knows he’s serious.

Bob, stop being so dramatic. Sheree just wants you to be remorseful for everything you did. His response was, “I’m remorseful.” Boy, bye! Sheree explains the seriousness of his actions during their marriage. It wasn’t just Sheree that Bob hurt, it was also their children. The man she was supposed to trust, left.

Don’t mess with a mother and her cubs.

Just when Sheree and Bob decide they can’t work things out, the group comes down to the cabin where Sheree and Bob hashed it out. For the sake of the group, Sheree and Bob put on a happy face. Kenya announced that she has a surprise planned for the ladies.

Kenya puts the final touches on the surprise party for the girls, which is actually a Divorce Party for Cynthia and Phaedra. I do, I did, I’m done! Of course the party is so extra: a ball and chain cake, penis games, and more.

Cynthia walks in, and didn’t give the reaction Kenya was hoping for. She almost starts crying, and then blurts out she doesn’t want a divorce party. Cynthia understood Kenya’s intentions, and played along with the party. When Phaedra walks in, she immediately announces that she feels sick. She stayed for a few minutes, then left because she needed to “find gingerale.”

Phony Phaedra, we see right through your gingerale excuse.

Phaedra texted Porsha, to tell her exactly how she felt. “I’m good, but appalled that they would think the breakup of a family is a cause for celebration, and with the host being the trifling woman who was texting my husband. Disgusting, and disgraceful.

Porsha, I don’t think that text was intended to be read out loud.

A little while later, Kenya left her party to go talk to Phaedra. Phaedra is laying in bed, with some gingerale, and Kenya sits at the foot of the bed to talk to her. Phaedra told Kenya she doesn’t want to celebrate her children losing their father, and that the whole party was tacky. Then, Phaedra says that Kenya played a contentious part in her and Apollo’s marriage.

Kenya stopped Phaedra at that point to defend herself. Kenya called Phaedra out on her nasty text to Porsha. Phaedra said Apollo and Kenya always flirted during her marriage, so it’s no wonder that she’s celebrating the divorce. Kenya told Phaedra not to “deify her (she totally used “deify” incorrectly, btw). Kenya explained that whatever problems Phaedra and Apollo had in their marriage, Kenya was just a grain of sand compared to the rest.

Unfortunately, Kenya, you’ve never been married, and were not united in their marriage. You can’t know that for sure. Phaedra, for once, be real at the get go. You only confessed your feelings once you were put in a corner and questioned.

Kenya brought up Phaedra’s restoration service the other night, and how she’s basically a hypocrite. Phaedra admits that she will never forgive Kenya, and nods her head in agreement to Phaedra doing the opposite of what she preaches. Kenya asks Phaedra if she would like to pray with her now, as they did on their trip to the Philippines. Phaedra declined the offer, on account of her stomach still hurting.

Kenya said, “Oh, you don’t have time for God?” Phaedra defended herself, saying that she has plenty of time for God. Kenya came back with, “Well maybe you should pray for yourself.”

So much drama. Back at the Divorce Party, Cynthia cut the chain on the ball and chain cake, and Kenya told the girls that it didn’t go well with Phaedra.

Porsha defended her partner in crime, saying her divorce just happened a week ago. No one knew about this, except Porsha, Phaedra, and Apollo.

Looks like Porsha spilled the beans, again. Girl, learn to keep a secret!

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