Ask Wendy: The Ultimate Betrayal
What do you do when the two people closest to you hurt you the most?
The latest “Ask Wendy” question comes from Revonia in Georgia who writes:
Dear Wendy, I have been with this guy for 10-years and we’ve been married for 4. I recently discovered that he was having an affair with my twin sister. I‘ve tried to find forgiveness in my heart for both of them but it’s hard. I had to experience so much hurt and pain. Me and my sister have always had a close relationship. I always had her back no matter if she was right or wrong but I’m struggling with being able to trust again. How do I even begin to move forward with my life?
Find out Wendy’s advice for dealing with the ultimate betrayal.
Tell Us: Do you agree with Wendy’s advice?
If you have a question you want to “Ask Wendy,” send her an email.
Monday March 8th, 2010 at 8:26 pm
I agree with you Wendy. She must remember what he did not what she thought
their relationship was. I would also add, she should feed her sister with a long handle spoon. (Keep a respectable distance)
Friday March 5th, 2010 at 12:32 pm
People true color come out during stress and difficult times. If someone betrays us then we are seeing their true nature and it is time to move on sister! Yeah I agree. I never dated a man that my girlfriends were dating. Sometimes their date would be interested in me and I would tell my girlfriend the true nature of this man and then I would tell the man to move on!
Friday February 26th, 2010 at 10:22 am
Great advice for dumping the cheating husband. However what if the sister decides to stay with her sister husband, how do you get through the holidays, family affairs, etc.???????
Wednesday February 24th, 2010 at 1:32 pm
How You Doing? If it was up to me, I will leave him, and forgive him later for what have done, but I will not take him back for nothing. The same with her, forgive her later. You can find somebody that will treat you like a QUEEN you are, not a piece of meat are something. You are a pretty lady. You don’t have to talk to him or her no more.Your man and her can be together forgiver. you can rememeber this, but you will not forget. If you want talk to your twin sister again just don’t breing her around your men.
Monday February 15th, 2010 at 2:54 am
Wendy,
I completely agree with you. Theres no turning back.
My ex cheated on me with my best friend from highschool while I was in the hospital. And she wasn’t the only one. Since then I’ve had other relationships and they also cheated on me. Some were even other men.
I just thank the Good Lord I didn’t get any diseases.
All the women that have been cheated on deserve a lot better then that.
Love Ya, & God Bless
Ina
Friday February 12th, 2010 at 1:53 pm
I don’t know how anyone could recover from that. You could divorce the husband, forgive him so you can detach yourself from hate, and find another man. However, you cannot find another sister, and therefore are forced to forgive her. But honestly, she is pretty much dead to you. They both are. Love out of obligation is not love.
Tuesday February 9th, 2010 at 4:14 pm
I know its hard to forgive espically something like this. Look deep in yor heart and forgive. But leave your x’s behind you chapter closed. Your sister did very wrong on you but she is your better half. Start on a new chapter in your life. Take a vaction by yourself. You never know what it will lead to. And it will help the soul to heal.
Wednesday February 3rd, 2010 at 4:39 am
I AGREE! I mean your twin sister…. NO!!!! Forgiveness will come, maybe not as soon as u want it to but it will come. My ex husband messed around with my baby sister AND my so called friends. I ended it and did exactly as Wendy said. Now, 8 years later I am barely talking to her again… though I forgave her a while ago. Just one of those things though…… everyone deals with it differently on a different pace but SO WRONG!
Monday February 1st, 2010 at 4:34 pm
i think that you should not talk to your sister nor your husband for as long as possible because its your emmotions and i think that your sister must have been jealous or tired of you getting all of the “good men”.Your husband must have had some feelings for your sister because sex comes from 2 people.Take your time and think it out, you can even move if you like and forget all about them cause all it is ,is drama but remember family comes first….Good Luck
Thursday January 28th, 2010 at 1:00 am
It’s nothing wrong with not talking to a family member even if it your sister!!! If she was your real sister she wouldn’t do anything like that if she really loved you! That just shows her jealousy and insecurity!!!!
Tuesday January 26th, 2010 at 4:52 pm
Wendy I have been with my daughter’s father for 3yrs and we dated 6yrs ago, when we started dateing again I proposed to him cause I didn’t want to lose him again. But he is no longer the person I fell in love with. We have sex when he wants, he don’t kiss me , he don’t hold my hand is like we are strangers. I feel like in a box don’t want to hurt him but I am not happy or in love anymore. I am also rasing his son Im 32 yrs old and have nothing I worked in Ny and live now in PA wont make the money I use to make and he dont wanna move to NY or even NJ he is cold and he says thats how he is but he wasnt cause if he was no way I would have go back with him. what to do help my sis says leave him live life find happiness and my cuz says love dont live here anymore so just stay for the kids. I have nothing and Im just afraid to start with nothing again or it might be a mistake. help please
Tuesday January 26th, 2010 at 12:18 pm
I sent you this as a question. I am living a similar situation, only my boyfriend has not had physical contact with my sister. He & she only talk on the phone. She has stopped all communication with me. If he had slept with my sister I would feel different, but I know my sister & she would be more to blame than him, because she would know how I feel about him. He is my heart & soul. She is family, but she is crossing not only the “family” line, but the “girlfriend” line.